I've been away, and not minded being away. I have only thought about a couple times and each time never with an urge or desire to write, or with any thought of what to write.

But today I thought, "Oh- I want to write that on my blog." I then thought, "Oh wait- I have stopped my blog."

I then thought about writing on facebook. I want to keep my internet outlets to a minimum. Then I thought- no. Even though my facebook profile is more privacy prtected then this blog it feels less safe. Which is so strange- to think that a public outlet on the internet can feel safe. I saw an example of this first hand this week. The job I am currently on has gotten a lot of public and media attention. There have been a lot of hurdles to climb, and meetings with the city, and police, and etc. Well the agency (who of course search the internet all the time for any buzz about the project) found a thread on a local blog with pictures, complaints, and all sorts of insider info on the project. It was very clear from the writing that it was a crew memeber and judging from what he was sayng it could only be a handful of people. Well- this made everyone very upset. I did some digging (not very deep) and found out this guy's wife also wrote on the blog. I found a two year old thread wishing this blogging couple a Happy Aniersary- now I knew their wedding date! The internet is so not safe.

With all of this said- today I felt like writing on the blog no matter what.

I want to turn over a new leaf. The past two weeks have been so jam packed I almost feel like it was months or years instead of days and weeks. In my effort to turn over a new leaf I really should be writing this in a handwritten pretty bound journal, but I am not. Oh well.

I start a new job tomorrow amd with it I hope to start many new habits.

My new job location is about 9 miles from my house. Public Transportation would require me to take a bus, then a train, then a shuttle, then walk. Driving the car every day for the length of the job is not really something BK or want, either. SO...I think I should ride my bike. It would get me in great shape and make me cooler. I am hesitant b/c I know that it is going to be painful- especially with the winter approaching. But when the job is over and it is summertime and I look kick ass on the beach you'll all be sorry.

I feel the need to start preparing for battle. I have said this before- but I feel it more and more. I feel the need to be challenged and made uncombfortable. I feel the need to shake things up and get in gear.

I am fearful and a wimp and terrified so hard I want to run run away. I know that is wrong. Riding my bike to work is kind of like a battle. It is a physical representation of the battle for me to change and improve. Hopefully as my outside gets in shape so will my insides.

If you see me please ask If I rode my bike to work and encourage me to do so if I say I did not.

I do not know if I will write again. If I do not, please do not be upset. Instead of reading me here, ask me questions in person. Or on the phone, or through e-mail, etc.